On behalf of boxes of hair everywhere...

Anyone watch "The Girls Next Door" on E! ? It's the..."reality"....show about Hugh Hefner's three girlfriends- Holly, who actually thinks he will marry her and she'll have his babies, Bridget, who has a master's but her greatest dream in life is to be in Playboy, and Kendra, who...well, I'm not quite sure what she does but so far all I can come up with is "professional exhibitionist".

My sister and I were watching the season premiere last Sunday, and got caught up in the age old debate of, what the hell are these girls doing with Hef? It's beyond transparent that, having asked at least two of them to be his girlfriend and live with him before even going on a date, that shenanigans are involved. In all senses of the word. It doesn't even seem particularly glamorous, seeing that they have curfews, limited budgets, and probably have to do things I shudder to imagine with a man old enough to be their grandfather.

The weirdest thing to me is that the parents of the girls are so supportive. Seeing the parents on the show explains a lot. Bridget, planning a striptease for Hef at his birthday party, rehearsed for her parents down to the pasties and G-string. They must be so proud. I wonder if she is cognizant of what this will do to her purported dream of being in broadcast journalism. Unless you count "Playboy after Dark" broadcast journalism.

Holly waited out all the other girlfriends until she got seniority. Now she sleeps with Hef in his bedroom and gets to be "number one" girlfriend. Lucky her. She actually seems to really love him and truly believe he will marry her, which makes me wonder just how strong her bleach is to have seeped through her skull and destroyed all her brain cells.

But Kendra- there aren't words for Kendra. Kendra likes to run around naked and do that booty rump shake thing. She's a hip hop video ho wannabe. And she is quite possibly the stupidest being on the face of the planet. I can't even begin to list examples of her banality because they are too numerous to count. My sister, upon witnessing the first of the many examples, dubbed her "dumber than a box of hair," which to be fair is not very nice to all the boxes of hair out there that look like Ken Jennings next to Kendra. Over the course of the hour, as she got dumber and dumber, the statement got abbreviated to just "box of hair" since we were saying it so often.